Two Sides of a Coin

Camping with my friends!

Over the weekend, I was lucky enough to see three shooting stars, eat four hotdogs, and stay up and talk about monsters.

I had talked about our planned camping trip the entire week before it. At work, I struggled to keep my mind on my project and counted each second of the remaining workday.

When Averie picked me up Friday, I was happy to see Alyssa for the first time since she came back from Japan. She told me a story about someone shitting in a lake. It quickly became a campfire classic.

The whole trip was full of laughs. I honestly don’t even know what was so funny. Drew skipping around, Tessa’s horrible driving, or maybe it was simply… Cami. When I can talk and laugh as loud as I can, you see the face of my personality.

When I go camping, I tend to get very reflective. Ashlyn suggested it might be because there are no distractions when in nature; I am just in the present moment. I think she was right.

I spent much time sitting alone, looking at the sky, and praying. I’m not sure what I was looking for, but it felt like the thing I wanted to do.

This is a different version of myself—the back of my personality.

I have often judged myself for not controlling this quiet side of myself. I often

place a lot of value on the energy I bring to groups, and I feel small when I am not doing it. That night was not one of them, and I did what I wanted to do—nothing.

Eventually, Cami, Shayla, and Ashlyn joined me. We talked through the dark, sharp night. We mended our pasts and ignored our future. We touched the middle child of our souls…our feelings.

The next day at the lake, Ben and I smiled at how far we could nuke a blitz ball. My motor was ready to run on high again.

I was no longer turned inward; I was the face of my personality again.

Often, I adopt a style or way of carrying myself. However, there are always two sides to the coin.